father, mother.

Both of you are equals – co-equals. You are not better than she is. She is not any better than you are. Hey! father, you are the head of the family and do you know that ideally mother is the joint-head. You are the head. She is the co-head. She is not the tail.

Father, love mother – your wife with an undying love. Love her as much as you love yourself. Develop a strong affection for her. Nurture a great respect for her. Make conscious efforts to see that the affection and the respect grows, evolves, and becomes grander. The love, respect and affection should mature from level to level, from height to height, in leaps and in bounds.

Father, mother is not your toy. She is not “a thing” to be used conveniently, re-used and somewhat discarded “whenever” for “whatever”. She is not your property. Mother is human just like you. She’s got a soul just like you. She’s got choices; free will, decision-making powers and inherent potentials just like you.

Father, you have a heart and a mind. You have strength and might. So also does mother. God indwells you. God indwells mother also. Both of you should be involved (together, in a united effort) in the decision making process. Not you alone. Both of you should labor for bread. Not just you (alone). Would you please let go of the archaic concept of, "I am the breadwinner, sole-breadwinner"? Both of you should actively participate in the beautification, continued enhancement and material maintenance of the home and the home-environment. Not mother alone. Both of you should spend quality time with the children. Not just her (alone).

Father, your love for mother should not be in word only but also in deed. Your love is clearly discernable in your fruits – your actions, your attitude, your condescension, your compromises, your voluntary relinquishment of some powers to mother. And of course, the same applies to mother!

By the way, father you have nothing to fear. History shows that mother would sincerely, honestly, wholeheartedly and unreservedly devote, entrust and commit (faithfully) herself to you. She would do this and more (SO EASILY) if you shower her with your love, attention and security. Cast away your fears – foolish fear, exaggerated fear, unfounded fear, primitive fear… Annihilate the prejudice, bias, stereotype, illusions…

Father, mother, submit yourselves, one to the other. The reality is, “both of you are dependent on each other”. Directly and indirectly, there exists a strong and a great mutual inter-dependence. As co-rulers, co-equals, be subject one to the other. Humility is the key! A joint-conscious cooperative effort is the door!! A joyous, stupendous and exhilarating family organization and government is the way!!! (The way to go.) Equality is the watchword. “This is, in deed and in truth, the high ideal of the family and the human institution of voluntary marriage.”

- O'karo E.K.D. Akamune